Friday, April 30, 2010

ONCE BITTEN, TWICE SHY

"Last Christmas", has been one of my all time favourite songs. I love the video, the lyrics, the rhythm and just everything about it. Yesterday I was just randomly listening to it when something struck me. It was this age 0ld idiom which comes in the lyrics of that song- once bitten, twice shy.
Very true, dont you think?

It is possible to really be naive again, when once we are bitten badly? I don't know. Does forgiveness and giving someone a second chance essentially mean the same thing? Come on, not many people can trust the same source of hurt or deceit a second time, can they? Being from a semi-christian background ( i will elaborate on that on a different post), I have been taught to forgive.God says, " Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us". I honestly feel confused. Am I just being a bad person when I refuse to trust again or is it just human? I look at my three year old cousin who has completely and absolutely refused to touch the candle ( Even when it is not burning!!) after she got a small burn around 6 or 7 months back. I feel like Arnie in "What's eating Gilbert Grape" taking his refusal to touch water and my refusal to give second chances.

May be it just the fear of taking risk. Rather, may be it is the subconscious fear of having to hold oneself responsible for all that could go wrong. Or may be it just being paranoid and shitty. A mistake is a mistake only the first time you make it. It will be a crime the next time. And here it will be a crime against oneself. It is almost suicide. If a person cheats you once, it is his mistake. If a person cheats you twice it is completely and totally your mistake. A fool is one who trusts strangers. A greater fool is the one who trusts false friends. I would rather give a stranger a first chance that a cheat a second chance. What do you feel?

Is this cynicism? In the never ending twists and turns of this confusing life how many times can we afford to take risks? It is like walking on a tight rope tied at the edges of two cliffs. Yes, life is that in short. You should enjoy the sights and the breeze you see. You should smile.It is important.But it more important to keep control. Over every single step one keeps, every breath one takes. It is important to maintain the thin balance that helps us move forward. Cheats are the occasional slips we face. Would you honestly keep your feet at a point that has been very shaky in the past or has a reputation for it? Would you let yourself fall? Specially when, as my dear friend Sandhya says, it is a fall with no safety nets? Would you?

I am confused. I cant as of now. But I don't know the correct answers to the moral questions behind such a decision. Once a person proves that he or she possesses no integrity, it is best to keep a distance. Anyway, this is desert rose's theory. Feel free to accept or oppose it.

Well, I am back to listening to "Last Christmas". Pausing occasionally like this, to pen my crazy thoughts in the form of a poem or prose. Well, it does make sense at times. Dont you think? When we act a particular way even without knowing why we do it. It is gut feeling really. And I know many would chose the path I have so 'wisely' chosen. Why else would they say, Once bitten twice shy !!

1 comment:

  1. The decision can be varying as to the importance of the person in your life. If it is just a stranger or a professional friend or immediate acquaintance ,feel free to keep the distance as they dont influence your life much.But if the person is so close like parents or a loved one or a very close friend ,then the decision comes from what kind of a person you are ; how you think ;whether you consider success/glory above personal relationships;love over safety;either heart or brain;or whether you love that person so much that you want him/her in spite of what they have done.and the answers will differ because everyone is different

    ReplyDelete